Are you in a truly healthy relationship?
Many of the clients we work with find themselves in a bind of what a healthy relationship looks like. Often red flags are overlooked (usually relating to trust and insecurity), by the good and dependable parts of the relationship. Overall, we have found these 5 components are good markers of what a secure, healthy and successful relationship not only has but develops with abundance.
1. Be the person you want to marry - Think about what you want in a partner? Can you be that? What comes to mind… confident, caring, trustworthy, emotionally available, strong, secure, fun loving, compassionate, supportive….this is different for everyone, depending on our needs, so is your partner meeting these for you, and are you meeting those needs for your partner?
2. Have secure & appropriate boundaries - Having self-respect as much as having respect for one another is key. Often people forget to think about what makes them feel secure and worthy within a relationship. This means they lack boundaries. When we don’t set boundaries we risk loosing a sense of self worth within the relationship which results in lack of respect for one another, low self esteem and the start of unhealthy patterned behaviours. Working together in the partnership to teach each other how you want to be treated and communicate what your boundaries are.
3. Build communication & trust- Being able to communicate the good and the bad within the relationship is key. Often one or both partners can be fearful in being open with their dissatisfactions or needs because they feel risk in losing the relationship altogether. By doing that you abandon your own needs & desires, ultimately eliminating possibility of having a true authentic relationship. Explore how you can communicate with mindfulness, do you come at your partner with criticism and contempt? This can often shut the other partner down. How you resolve conflict and repair challenges together is key in forming a long term secure & trusting bond.
4. Understanding your partner’s past - Do you truly understand who your partner is? Moreover, how your partners life experiences has made them who they are today? We often find our past life lies the secrets to how we show up to love in our present relationships. If we can learn from our past, understand how it has effected our present and take responsibility for our part in a relationship then we have no boundaries between us showing up fully to love, for life long happiness.
How does your relationship stand up to theses key themes and questions?….share thoughts and comments below 🙂